Waking up, May 8: what attention feels like
I’ve been meditating daily for more than 173 days now using the Waking Up App to sustain my practice. This post is to help me remember one of two memory-worthy recent daily meditations. This one on May 8 and this one today as I post this, May 15.
Notice what attention feels like
In the daily mediation for May 8, Just before 4:00, Sam Harris said: “As you pay attention to the breath, notice what your attention itself feels like.”
He then goes on to “Does it feel like it’s originating in your head?
And then goes on: “If so, then notice that every reference point that you have for your head…anything you can notice by which to define the source of attention….that is simply appearing in the space of consciousness.”
I went in a slightly different direction.
Attention is just something in consciousness
I saw that attention itself was just something in the space of consciousness — just one more thing.
This description is not entirely accurate because, at that moment, there was no “I” that “saw.” There was an awareness of attention and an awareness of what attention was.
Consciousness included — if only in moments — the awareness that attention itself was something that arose and passed away.
Consciousness included an awareness that awareness (as well as attention) was something that arose and passed away.
It was clear that consciousness was prior to both attention and awareness.
All of that arose, and then passed away.
And now this arises
Some fragment of whatever the fuck it is or means or could be or could mean arose in the chat channel that I shared with my sangha.
“Sooner or later,” I told them, “you will wake up and read what I wrote and what I wrote will arise and pass away in consciousness for each of you. And as we chat away even that which has arisen in this channel will scroll up, and pass away in this channel.”
And you, reader of this blog, this idea has now entered your field of consciousness. And soon it will pass away.